“Mirror, mirror, on the wall… who’s the fairest of them all”? Oh, the allure of – jealously. Early in my 20’s, after the experience of a relationship I was in, I was able to develop a definition I now own for jealousy. To me if jealousy appears, it is a signal to unpack one’s story, particularly individual self-image.
Through the metaphor of a mirror, we reflect ourselves by how we are seeing others. A good example is stories related to jealousy. When we become jealous the strongest motives are likely insecurity or lack, from unspoken stories, of ourselves. We view in the other person, unconsciously or consciously, characteristics we desire to possess ourselves. Or we perceive someone having, maybe taking, what we want or believe to be ours. It is not about the other person. They are a mirror exposing what is truth if we choose to see it. It is natural, and perhaps easier, to deflect and turn away from the unveiling of our own story. The work to move beyond the triggered jealousy, means accepting who we are is enough and there are limitless possibilities available to all. We might have to consider letting go the idea that achieving who we want to be and what we want to have, rests upon efforts directed toward the object of our jealously. Personal accountability.
Obvious examples professionally often relate to career advancing/placement and formal/informal competition. (Along with a slew of personal / family examples; relationships, looks, talents, intelligence, achievements, etc.) A trusted confidant, coach, can help unpack confidence and abundance. The “witch” acting alone didn’t change the truth spoken by her mirror, nor did her desires to eliminate who stirred her jealously.
May one look directly into the mirror of jealously, acknowledging what they are seeing. Empowered there is the chance to write the story of our truest reflection, which often radiates a beauty beyond what the eye beholds but rather the heart holds.
Coaching to Inspire a better life, a better way!
Newsletter - June 2021